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Sanctuary Scuttlebutt

By Kristi Peifer

It was an especially boisterous meet and greet time at Living Water Christian Church. The Sunday morning worship service was packed to the brim. Reverend Adams made his way through the crowd, stopping here and there to talk or shake hands with someone. He loved this part of the service except for when old Mrs. Dillery tried to buttonhole him.

He glanced over his shoulder and sure enough, there she was, charging toward his position like ants to a picnic basket. Something about that I’ve-got-an-earful-for-you look on her face always made him shudder inside. He quickly excused himself from the conversation he was having and made a beeline for the pulpit.

The Reverend grabbed the microphone and signaled it was time to wrap up the chit chat. “My, what a lively group we are this morning!” he said. A few congregants chuckled.

“Let’s start our prayer time this morning with praises,” he continued. “I trust someone has something good to share with us this morning?”

“My Grandma Sue just got out of the hospital. She’s doing much better,” a young woman said.

“I’m so glad to hear it!”

A man added, “I have a second interview for the job at the school!”

“Praise the Lord!” Reverend Adams nodded as he scribbled down the praises. “Anyone else?”

Mrs. Dillery stood up. “I have a prayer request,” she announced. “Jeff and Julie Reilly’s teenage daughterthe younger onerecently came up pregnant!” She paused for effect.

A collective gasp rose from the mothers in the sanctuary.

“They’re saying Joey Billingsley is the father,” she continued. “I tell you what, if that was my daughter, I wouldn’t have let him within ten feet of her. Look at the stock he comes from! The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, after all.”

A teenager snickered from the back pew.

“Now, Joan,” Reverend Adams started, but Mrs. Dillery wasn’t about to stop talking.

“Poor Julie is just beside herself! You know, her blood pressure wasn’t so good to begin withnow she’s probably halfway to a coronary!”

Reverend Adams took a deep breath. “Joan, this is prayer time.”

“Yes, I know, Pastor. Isn’t it so much easier to pray for someone when you know specifically what they’re going through?”

She barely stopped to take a breath before answering the question herself. “Of course it is!”

“Thank you for your concern, Joan. I’ll be sure to pray for youuh, them.”

Mrs. Dillery sat down with a flourish, obviously pleased with her selfless regard for others. Her neighbor in the pew started peppering her with questions. Their whispering was less than circumspect.

Reverend Adams chose to ignore the distraction, instead opting to start his sermon.

“Please turn in your Bibles to Proverbs, where we’ll continue our study of chapter ten. Let’s begin with verse nineteen. ‘Too much talk leads to sin. Be sensible and keep your mouth shut.'”*
*Proverbs 10:19 (NLT)

Copyright Kristi Peifer, 2011.

I am a pastor’s wife, the mother of two special needs children, a performer, and a lover of all things funny. My sincerest desires are to glorify Jesus Christ and to make someone laugh–preferably at the same time.

Visit me at http://www.neverkissatoaster.blogspot.com

Article Source: http://www.faithwriters.comCHRISTIAN WRITER

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